Friday, August 30, 2013

I Miss My Best Friend

I wanted to name this post something real crazy and confusing, so that way y'all would start thinking some crazy stuff, but I decided that it would cause some controversy against me.

Sample title names:
"I'm In Love With A..."
"And Then I Fell In Love..."
"My Twin Sister"
Or some other random stuff. I can't exactly remember everything that I thought of, but I decided against all of them and chose to play it safe.

I could go on about Alyssa's and mine happy sappy chick romance, but it's not like that at all. She's just like another sister of mine. And trust me, I miss my real life sister uber much so. But before Alyssa, I never really had the classic, "best friend." She fits. And at Whitewater, there really wasn't a day that we didn't see each other. We've been friends for two years now and we've only ever been a hop, skip, and a jump away from each other.

I have to wait until NOVEMBER to see her y'all. November. That's... *counts on fingers*... almost 5 months of not being able to see her whenever we decide we need to hang out. That's crazy. Absolutely crazy.

So yeah. I miss her. I miss scaring all of our friends with how in-sync we are together. That's the best part of our friendship. I also miss her family. They're fun. (Yes, yes, I miss mine too. But this post isn't about them. It's about Alyssa.)

Two years ago.
Last April

I just realized we didn't even take any pictures together the last time we hung out. What the hell kind of crap is that?

Whatever. November. We shall be reunited and take over the city of Lubbock.


<3 Tawny

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Second Day of Grad School

"Wha'd'ya mean second day?! You didn't post about a first!"

Well tough cookies! Yesterday wasn't special and I don't think I need to be wasting mine or your time by blogging about my syllabus. We both have much more important facets of our lives. Am I right?

So anyway, like I said, yesterday I had my first class of grad school. The class is Student Services in Higher Education. Which, for all of you non-higher ed. folk, it basically means, 'learning about different departments.' Literally, we skimmed through the syllabus, introduced ourselves to the class and the professor, talked about our first assignment, and then peaced out. Nothing special. Whatsoever.

Today, I had Higher Education Seminar. Which, really, it's an intro class to research. Oh great, research, right? Wrong!

Sidenote: At this point, I'm about 85:15% leaning towards taking the thesis route. I don't know yet! I haven't defined it yet! So don't start asking me all of these crazy questions about it. Unless you have important advice that you need to tell me about. That is always welcome. :)

Anyway, I will have to agree, this class seems a bit scary. Very writing intensive. A lot of writing skills that I did not acquire as a business student prior to now, but I've learned that I am not the only one. Less scary. We have to write a research paper in this class. And, pretty much all of the assignments leading up to us turning in said paper, are basically just steps to writing it! Awesome.

Next week, we start by choosing a topic to start researching on. Not even writing yet, but just to begin gathering information. In the class we began talking about the general notions, workings, and ideas that go into a university, just from personal experiences. ALL OF THESE IDEAS ARE JUST FLOATING EVERYWHERE IN MY BRAIN!
- What am I interested in: A lot.
- What could I write about without hating it afterwards: I have no idea.
- Maybe I could write about an interest I may have for my thesis, and then expand from there?
- Is there enough to research on?
- Should I pick something that I don't Want to write a thesis on, and just use this class for practice? Maybe. I think that's the point, but still. So many options!

Nevertheless, we barely brushed the surface of what this class will be about, and I haven't even read anything for it. Which, by the way, I'm not looking forward to reading for Any class. I've always been opposed to forced readings. Which, is kind of how I feel about trending books. But that's another post for another time.

So, why didn't I wait to post about classes until tomorrow? I skipped one day, but talked about both, so not wait another day and talk about all three?
Tomorrow is History. Eff history. I'm least looking forward to this class. *shiver* Good thing it's being taken first semester and I can get it out of the way! But yeah, I probably won't have much to say about tomorrow. Who knows though.

Basically, I just wanted to tell you how excited I am to do some research. (Okay... Who kidnapped the real Tawny and can someone bring her back to Earth? This girl is freakin' me out...)

<3 Tawny

Monday, August 12, 2013

Adverbs Have Feelings Too...

Okay, I have serious plans for real posts soon, but I needed to step back and get real with y'all.

It's time for another grammar lesson. 
I'll admit, I'm not the best at it myself. I use commas way too often and sometimes not enough. Overcompensation. When I write, I use a lot of incomplete sentences. I'm terrible at spelling under pressure. (Why I didn't ever enter into a spelling bee even though I had teachers who always wanted me to.) And I did not obtain an English degree. I didn't even do that well in my college English courses either to be honest.

But! I try my HARDEST to be at least aware of grammar.

Let's make it cool again y'all. 
I know society raises us to answer, "How are ya," with, "I'm good." But, that doesn't mean we have to actually say it! If there's a trend to rebel against, let it be the omission of adverbs. I'll be okay with all of you Beliebers and Twilight fanatics if you took a little more caution in your grammar.

I always try to answer, "How are you," with, "I'm doing quite well, thank you!" (Gotta throw in a little etiquette too. It makes people feel special inside dammit!)

Sometimes, I slip up. Like, if I'm too busy to talk and thinking cap is wedged on too tightly for talking to make way, I'll answer with, "I'm good." And as soon as I'll say it, I will mentally kick myself in the face. And I can't just retract it. I can't just say, "Just kidding! I meant I'm doing well!" Then I'll just sound like an idiot.

It really doesn't bother me when others answer with, "Good." Because well, majority rules, and it's extremely difficult to break that habit. Trust me. I've been workin' on it for quite a while now.

But, I have to tell you what does bother me, why it does, and why you should work on bringing adverbs back into our vocabulary.

What About Our Language Bothers Me.
It's the one language we're required to learn. (Two years of a foreign language my ass. Like that helps anyone.)

Going through school, in every English class, (before English it was Reading, or Language Arts) we had the dreaded grammar sections. Where we would spend a few weeks learning all about grammar? Remember? The only thing that we enjoyed about them was the School House Rock videos? My favorite was always Conjunction Junction. Still is. But this isn't time for that!!

Anyway, I remember also having D.O.U. (Daily Oral Usage) every morning throughout elementary school. I ROCKED D.O.U. I was a freakin' beast! But those actual grammar lessons? Those were a pain in my rear.

And every time it came to learn about adverbs, I hated it even more, because I felt as if the teacher never quite knew how to explain them well enough. Which made me dislike them even more. I felt as if they were worthless.

I vaguely remember one classmate asking how often we actually use adverbs, and the teacher responded with something like, 'I don't know, very rarely." (((AHEM! Adverb.)))

So Why Let It Bother Me?
I feel, like I was cheated. Like we all have been cheated!

Of course, this doesn't really provide much explanation..

School House Rock - Adverbs

But all I remember from in class lessons is, "An adverb describes a verb." Basically, that is true. There's more to it, (cue video) but that is exactly what I am consciously aware of daily.

"Am I going to say this sentence correctly?" "Which form of word do I use?" "Would it be easier if I just said it differently?" "Does this even make sense?"

I don't think many people ever think that way, and I believe that is what bothers me.

The internet is slowly demolishing our language. SAVE IT! SAVE YOURSELVES!! SAVE YOUR CHILDREN!!! Think before you speak, before you type, before you send; before it's too late!

It's The Small Things.
I can't possibly provide an entire lesson. Remember, I'm no expert. I'll admit. I don't know it all. That's impossible. So let's start rather small.

First off, I looked up the word small. It's an adjective. An adjective describes a noun. Normally, one would say, "Let's start small." It sounds correct, right? Technically, no.

How are we starting? We're starting rather small. The word starting is an action verb, and we're trying to describe our action. (Does this make sense?)

Great. Let us move on.

We could add an -ly at the end of small, and say that we'll be starting smally, but that just does not flow correctly off of the tongue. sounds gross. *Side Note: I looked it up. Smally is a word. But I keep getting the red, squiggle-line underneath it. I hate that line.

The word 'rather' is actually an adverb! And I just received confirmation by the video and Google. (Because Google knows all.)

So, rather is basically used as a crutch for small to lean on, as it tries to describe our action. (Does that make sense?)

Our Daily Oral Usage.
A Facebook post I saw today said, "Interview went good..." and, "...I think I did good."

No. *Shakes head vigorously* No.

Here are the questions I think of when it comes to things such as this:

"How did it go? It went well! How did I do? I did well!" 

How does he dance? He dances crazily. 

How does she drive? She drives quickly. 

The difference:
It went good. I did good.

He dances crazy.

She drives quick.

You kind of sound like a caveman. Do you hear it? Say it out loud? Say it with a deep voice.

(What kind of voice? A deep voice.)
((See the difference in question type too?!?!?!))
(((This is an adjective question.)))

Do We Understand A Little Better?
This post went way longer than I intended it to. And I omitted a lot of talking points. Happens every time. I'll let you go for now.

Go to bed. Go to sleep.

You're keeping me up internets!

What are you doing?!

I need sleep toooooo! *Makes pouty face*

Okay. I'm done. 

Thank you for reading!

I hope you enjoyed and/or benefited from today's post in a way!

<3 Tawny

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Confessions of a Timid Extrovert

So, I'm finding out more and more that I'm an extrovert. But not in the way that most are. I need constant human contact. Or at least socialization in some form or another. But I'm shy, so I'm not as overbearing as some tend to be. I'm not as out there. I kind of... lurk in the shadows and wait for someone to come find me. So, others tend to see me as someone who doesn't need to hang with people, or someone who doesn't desire that special attention. But I do. I really do. I need that limelight.

Before I left for Texas, I was super excited for my new job. The thought of not having to actually be responsible for a staff of students, be on call from the get-go, and simply have a 3/4 time work day and be done... With all of the same benefits?! It sounded like bliss. Pure bliss.

When I got here, I was immediately immersed in the culture and taken in by such welcoming arms. Right away, my cohort and I became very close. I adore them all quite dearly. Odd quirks and all. We had our staff retreat, and I felt closer to them than I think I do with most of my friends. Strange.

But I think I started to take it for granted because when pro staff training ended, that's when I realized that the CAs (RAs) were coming back. Then, CA training. Along with CA training, it's past the 8-5 work day. There are staff dinners, in-hall training, staff development, etc, and etc.

I started becoming very apprehensive. Training is my favorite time of year. Why am I so anxious?

It's simple. My cohort, now have jobs past office hours. I don't have a staff. I don't have a group of people to simply have a staff dinner with. I'm not bonding with people anymore. I don't have anyone to look after, to fumble over as I try to teach them things I only just recently learned myself. I don't get to sit in special training sessions and work one on one with students.

After the first day of training, I left my office and went to my apartment. I wanted to text my new friends, "Who wants to grab dinner together," like we did for the past 3 weeks. Everyone already had dinner plans. So I ate by myself. Sometimes, it's not so bad. But I wasn't ready for it. I like eating with others. I like conversing. I like, social interaction. On the plus side, I was able to talk to my sister on the phone. That was wonderful. But she wasn't there. I was by myself, eating homemade(ish) pasta, watching Star Trek. That's not that fun. I felt so lonely. I just wanted to go to sleep and it was only 8pm. (I'm a night owl.)

But then the second day of training, I was able to eat lunch with all of the student and professional staff. One staff temporarily adopted me. I felt so special. So loved. Even though they didn't know me. I felt included. It was nice.

Today was difficult. I spent most of the day, sitting in bed, reading, watching tv, painting my nails, and playing games on my phone. To some people, that sounds like a dang good day, but I wasn't feelin' it. I had nowhere to go, nothing important to do. I looked at the training schedule just to see when someone would be available. After dinner, there was nothing planned! Great! I texted one friend and asked if she wanted to go shopping after. Nope. She had a staff meeting. Darn.

I started to feel alone again. I could have texted others, but rememeber, I'm shy. Especially after being rejected once, I didn't want to face the risk again.

Then I got a text. An invite to the movies! We didn't end up making it in time and got ice cream instead, but an invite! Someone reached out to me. It felt good.

After ice cream, we hung out and watched a movie at my apartment. It was exactly what I needed to feel back on that mental track. I love hosting. It makes me feel well making others feel well aslo. And by hosting get togethers in my apartment, it's fulfilling. For everyone else, it was a way they could unwind, destress, and not worry. I was able to provide that atmosphere for them. And for that, I am grateful.

I feel very happy right now. I'm not stressed about my job, I love it and it's no where near as demanding as the rest of my staff. But to feel like I'm still a part of them even though I don't have to worry about my own personal staff of CAs? That recognition is important to me.

I could not have asked for a better night.

Thank you.